If you were born ugly...

:056:

Sun, 21 Dec 2008 06:54:22 GMT

Captain. Now Ikkaku.

...Ikkaku.

You were last to the party. You're supposed to the be last one to leave. You never... had any manners.

...stupid brute.

~~I'll treasure it.~~ It's very beautiful.

Christmas. Such a useless holiday.

[ooc: Yumichika baaaw. ._. bff 'kakku went home. he h8s you all]

:055:

Fri, 05 Dec 2008 21:43:34 GMT

Ah... Fear not City. I have not disappeared, so cease your mourning. I have merely been catching up on my beauty rest so that I may continue to shine brightly for you in this month of December.

Yes, yes, your blazing Yumichika star still burns passionately with vivid light. Admire me with all your strength, beautiful ones.

As of late, I've developed an interest in cherries and the latest downloads of human music for the iPod. Need I charm you into bringing me either~?

By the way, house of the 11th... Did we acquire another dog or was that a dream?

:054:

Tue, 11 Nov 2008 21:34:00 GMT

Come~ Come~ Come~ My unfortunate Uglies. Today your beautiful Yumichika has decided to be most charitable and amiable. I will take you under my wing and teach you to be the best that you can be. True, your level will never come close to mine, but to have a taste of almost-perfection is a gift that I would like to bestow upon you. Strength and beauty are things most necessary for a full and wonderful life! ♥ Let me serve as your beacon of hope and guide you with all my radiance.

I know a few of you are rather shy about stepping up for aid, but do allow me to address you personally. It is the first step in crawling from your ugly shell, you pitiful larvae. ♥

Speaking of insects, oh ugly Cockroach-chan~ Come to me, you worthless thing. ♥ My greatest efforts will be reserved for you, for you are in dire need. Let us work on that sloppy physique, shall we? And that mask has to go as soon as possible. So much work, so much work...

Shihouin Yoruichi~ ♥ Those split ends. Tsktsk! Such thick and pretty hair made ragged by your lazy and careless ways. And you must be careful of those hips as well. It looks as if you've already delivered a litter of kittens. Imagine that at your age! Give yourself to me and I will transform you into a delicate, wild-eyed sex kitten~ Meow.

Kurosaki-san, let's not be tacky. The hair color has to go. And your pores are atrocious. Do you ever bathe after your battles? I could build a mountain from the clogs in your skin. You'll never win the affections of that ample-bosomed bombshell with those nasty habits.

Ah, the Arrancar and their Rat King. Save the best for last, mn? What isn't wrong with the lot of you? Where to begin, where to begin... I'm afraid that there is no hope for your filthy, greedy, pieced-together toys, but you still have a fighting chance, Aizen-san. Even though your personality is awful and your actions are bastardly, you manage to be civil. Why can't your looks follow suit? That slicked back hair. Really... I believe I saw a pimp of sorts in Karakura Town with the same style.

Ahh, even the dogs have my mercy today. The poor, disgusting things. I will groom them accordingly and locate suitable collars. Something with a jingle, perhaps...

So much to do and so much friendly aid to supply. Yes, City, your Beautiful Messiah is waiting. ♥

[ooc: cursed like a mother eff. And yes, this is him being friendly. Cursed or not, he is still himself. >D]

:053:

Fri, 07 Nov 2008 19:23:44 GMT

...Ewh.

So many sick faces to deal with. I can't take them all in in one day or I'll lose my vision! Just think of all the disgusting germs floating about in the air now. My poor, vulnerable skin...

The lot of you sick ones, keep your distance. I can't afford your viruses ruining my day. All that sneezing, coughing, flustering, and so on... Threatening to invade my superior body. I shudder at the very thought! Isn't it a human remedy to bite the heads off chickens in hopes of better health or something like that? Whatever chickens are, find one and bite it already!

Honestly, this City is annoying. Most of the Deities are probably leather-faced snobs with nothing better to do. Except that Sabine. What a pretty one she is~ Her skin is so nice.

I'll kill that other one for what he did.

Restlessness has taken me. Hanatarou, I will be over to view movies and such things on the television. It's really too bad Kira-san wasn't able to watch his adult movies before he left the city.

[ooc: D: sorry for dropped tags and missed posts. Semester has been kicking my ass sideways. It will all be over in December. ;-; Papi, Yumi hates you. Sick humans are gross. kthanxbye]

:052:

Mon, 27 Oct 2008 21:38:50 GMT

Really, there is no point in trying to keep number. Like some gluttonous beast, this annoying city sucks you up and spits you out without an ounce of sympathy. I do wonder when my time will come. Ikkaku's. Captain's. Vice Captain's.

We have suffered losses on both sides yet again. The balance here is more delicate than at home. Now that I have seen this side and the other, I ponder if the return will be bitter-sweet.

Losses. Nothing more.

Concerning these orders, I will suffer no consequence due to the responsibilities of higher officials. Investigation will cease at my own discretion. Should I come to reprimand, it will be well-earned.

Tonight, consumption of the finest sake and a luxurious bath. The returned monkey may watch his own meager creations.

Halloween? What purpose does this celebration serve? To put a mask over this face would be a most blasphemous thing. Idiotic.

Death the Kid's most esteemed father, I would like to make your aqcuaintance.

[ooc: Half BAW/Half Bored. Slightly agitated. Pre-Menstrual Shinigami desu.]

:051:

Wed, 22 Oct 2008 17:05:17 GMT

[Private]
Assignment accepted by one Ayasegawa Yumichika.

Report:

October 22. Eleven AM. Location undisclosed.

Second day of observation. Arrancar activity appears to be normal. No hostile actions have been taken against humans. The target, though volatile, remains at bay. Observation will continue in two hours time.

End report.

[/Private]

[Private]

Pink, today. A garish color. I have offended myself by wearing this. A note: never accept dares.

Also, there is a new, temporary arrival. In my possession for only a few days, we get along beautifully.

Stunning eyes, no? I've nicknamed him 目海. I admire that kanji.

Very sweet and calm, but he likes to bat at my feathers every so often. I believe he looks just like BiHe~ ♥ Small, cute, and intelligent. And he also ate my grilled fish! His favorite place to sleep is inside my lapel and I couldn't think of a more ideal place for him to be. Those bothersome dogs constantly try to snout their way into my clothing, but fortunately my time at home is considerably diminished, given my current task. With the break that I have, I will take him to the remote section of the temple to eat and play.

I'm surprised at myself. Fostering a kitten... And Zaraki-taichou, Vice Captain and Ikkaku are still none the wiser~ ♥

[/Private]

[ooc: Quick report. Quick complaint. Quick loev. Kitten unhackable? :D ♥ Kitteh sleeps against his pretty manchest, a la icon. Hangs out there most of the day and while at home. His orange thingies are pink today and he wants to die.]

:050:

Fri, 17 Oct 2008 20:38:23 GMT

Felines. ~~I don't like felines. I don't like animals. Especially felines.~~ But there is one in particular... ~~I liked the kitten form. I think I want one. Do I want one?~~ ...~~No!~~ What sort of insane talk is this? I can't stand these hideous creatures.

But he was terribly cute... The stripes were even still there. And his feet were so small. Ah, such pretty, soft fur, too. A warm little ball of purrs and whiskers. Little tail. ...He ate my grilled fish! ♥ Adoption. A small one. Maybe for a little while.

Apprehension of Circus Thunderface or whatever its name is. This occasion calls for a fresh, new uniform. Aizen's pests are such a bother.

:049:

Tue, 14 Oct 2008 20:24:41 GMT

A present, is it? This is your idea of a present? In my waraji, no less. Well then, to show my gratitude, I offer you this:

I'll find you, Shihouin Yoruichi! It doesn't matter if there is a curse today or not! I will weed you out even if I have to sort through every animal in this city! How many foul, tasteless, lazy cats can there be? Or perhaps you were turned into something more fitting for your personality. A pig, maybe. I'll skin you, demonic woman!

And as for the rest of you. How unfortunate. Let us hope that the City cursed you to be something of decent beastly beauty. If I have to wander through the lot of you, I'd prefer not to gain eye strain by the end of the day. My eyes are not suited to behold anything less than lovely. And stay out of my way, else I'll have your pelt.

~~Had I been cursed, surely you all would be painfully stricken green with envy.~~

[ooc: Pissed desu! :D Yoruichi left a hairball in his shoe. Yumi smash. Today he has a distaste for felines. Especially black ones. Feel free to attack/harass/kill him with cute at will, animals. He will be all over the city, invading your posts. Watch out, Kuchiki.]

:048:

Fri, 10 Oct 2008 00:24:16 GMT

Ah, what a glorious arena. It wasn't there just yesterday. Perhaps it is a gift from those pesky Deities. After investigating the grounds and the vast interior, I've developed a marvelous idea~

"Self-Defense" students of Ayasegawa Yumichika and Madarame Ikkaku, show me your strength. Surely there has to be some progress after months of such intense training under one of the strongest men I know and the most beautiful man alive to assist him. (That would be yours truly, for those of lesser intelligence.) Dawn your uniforms, my little ones. Freshly washed and crisp, as it is mandatory that you not embarrass me. ~~I'll have your heads, otherwise.~~ Discard age and gender; tonight you will be made into warriors of the most vicious degree. How far have you come? How red is your blood? How strong is your will?

That we have yet to find out. Consider it a final exam for the month to determine your standing. First blood declares the winner in a free for all match.

But of course, it would be rude to not extend the invitation to the students of one Shihouin Yoruichi. If you feel you have what it takes, come to the arena and leave your blood splatters as signatures that you were there. My team will gladly aid you in doing so. Hopeful recruits, don't be silent. Come to play. I'd like to see your skill in the martial arts. Let us christen this great structure with everything you've got.

Wounds will be tended to accordingly. Failures will result in intensified training.

Spectators are more than welcome. It would be a most brilliant honor if the Sohma clan graced me with their lovely presence.

And yes. If there is some question about my strength, I'm more than willing to satisfy your curiosity if you aren't ugly.

[ooc: Penalty training = playtime with Kushi and Dribbles-chan. And that's going easy on 'em. >>]

:047:

Wed, 01 Oct 2008 19:17:29 GMT

[Enter Yumichika into the 11th household, missing since early last night. He spares no glances toward nor regards any members that may be present. The only sound from him is the soft slide of his feet against the floor as he makes his way to his room. He drips with blood of both his and his opponent's and the fresh scent of gunpowder taints the air. His skin is scorched and littered with burns, clothing torn to shreds in some places, but his hair is strangely kempt. A wig, for every self respecting beauty has one in times of crisis. A stern, unreadable expression dawned, negative energy radiates from his being so thick that even Kushi and Dribbles-chan slither from his quarters with a whine and a tail tucked between their legs. The door to his bedroom closes behind him.]

Impossible.

Hanatarou-san.

[ooc: FINARRY I get to use one of his bloody icons! >DDD Post-scrap with Papillon. The outcome was an epic draw in which he received the most damage and failed to kill Papi. That's just about equal to a loss in his mind, so he will be pissed. His SPESHAL technique was thwarted from full efficiency because he got that ass blown up. What he did manage to drain from Papi has helped to heal the more minor of his wounds but he's still a hot mess. The cause of all this? Yoruichi and her booty. They cause far too much trouble. >D tl;dr stfu]

:046: Ants and Toy Soldiers

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 06:47:41 GMT

We are either. We go along, day to day, performing the task designated to us. Some greater than others, some so insignificant that they are mere busy work. In times of war, we fight. In times of peace we live. We win, we lose, we break, we heal. Puppets on strings are we? Or are we unrealized masters of our own fate? Circumstances of birth matter little once we have found our purpose. Artificial or natural, doctored or unadulterated, man, beast, or something in between, we exist.

Once the first breath of life is drawn, it is ours to control. Strings may bind and they may bind tightly, but they can be cut. Weild the blades of strength, conviction, will, and courage without fear. Form a path for your own life with unfaltering ferocity. Do not yeild and do not allow yourself to be consumed by distraction. You have a goal, don't you? Cut down all that stand in your way as you drive for it.

It seems that he can't see the tree for the forest. As stubborn and reckless as he is, I know he will succeed. He is strong.

He's slightly cute when he over-thinks.

:045:

Sat, 27 Sep 2008 02:55:13 GMT

Ah, another year beneath my sash. Unlike some, I haven't lost count of the days since my birth. Time continues, and the years gently grow in number like ripples upon the surface of water. Mine have eternity to come to an end, so I watch them in all their splendor. Just how many rings have formed, you ask? That is something you will never know~ ♥ And it is customary to give gifts for birthdays, isn't it? Ikkaku, you may purchase this item called an "iPod" for me. I hear it is an exciting thing to have.

And while I am on the subject, what is all the curiosity about Shinigami lately? While I am flattered to be admired and asked questions about how something so beautiful as myself can exist and only be seen by certain Idiots, I don't think it is wise to reveal everything. Some things are better left taboo. As a guardian and deliverer of souls, I offer a small piece of advice: Live a good life and live it well. ~~Not doing so only makes my job more difficult.~~

In addition, I've been spared from a string of curses save one. I've discovered that it was not a curse but some sort of unexplained mishap. Be it Deity or some other cause that turned me female, I will have your head. ♥

Furthermore I--

THERE IS A HOLLOW TAKING RESIDENCE ON MY BED! AND A WOLF! WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!

KUCHIKI-TAICHOU!

[ooc: Birthday was Sept. 19th. ;o; Ichigo is teh dumb. Doesn't mind the blood on the carpet. Just found out about THE DOG MONSTERS.]

:044: [Accidental Video Post]

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 16:40:36 GMT

[After the initial shock at his new body, complete with frantic screams, flailing and bogus accusations, cue Yumichika eyeing himself in the mirror. Acceptance has hit. And so has the video feed button on his communicator.]

...Ikkaku. I need your assistance.

Annoying City. Really.

[ooc: Yeah. One last lulz for the road! Let's make it a good one, people. ♥ Yeah it's Rihanna STFU. The hair worked, okay?! Sampling sweets in the City did this to him. Watari, you'll die. PS. All residents of the 11th household will come upon this cleaning the Junk Room. ]

:043:

Fri, 05 Sep 2008 21:10:04 GMT

Saa, a curse. Annoying for some, pleasant for others. A simple adjustment in attitude would solve the problem until midnight arrives. I've never heard of an instance where a Shinigami was struck by lightening, but it would be a tragedy for the first occurrence to happen here. Take care, won't you? Allow my pleasant disposition and most graceful appearance to brighten your day.

Ikkaku, Captain and I are going to the Underground. He is most lively today so the show will be something wonderful to behold. Spectators should use caution, of course. We can't be responsible for injury due to stray limbs flying. Besides, I need something pleasant to watch so that the image of that ugly cockroach can be erased from memory.

He called me flabby. Me. Flabby. Stupidity can't be fixed, can it?

Ah, and that reminds me. It seems my dear BiHe has grown on me. I spoke his language today. BiHe, I noticed that that pitiful excuse for a "butterfly" had a blatant flaw and I stated that it was "not symmetrical." ♥ It was fitting!

Captain and Vice Captain, make room for your beloved Fifth Seat. ~~Pending the addition of a disgusting animal. Clearly Kuchiki-taichou is to blame for this.~~

:042:

Fri, 22 Aug 2008 18:47:58 GMT

I suppose I can call this "playing catch-up," so to speak. So much has happened and I failed to keep record. ~~I was struggling to make myself even more beautiful than I already am.~~ Not that I have a reason to justify such.

Thus far, an influx of new faces in the City. A Sohma is among them. Welcome, Sohma-san. I've met nearly all of them. Quite a nice arrangement of faces to be surrounded by if I must admit. It's enough to lift my spirits and banish the memories of uglier citizens here.

And I have been fortunate enough to be unaffected by the string of curses lately. Mere luck, or are the Deities too smitten with my beauty to affect me? More than likely it is the latter. ♥ How very understandable.

What is this talk of things attacking faces today? If you look a certain way, you only brought it upon yourself.

Hitsugaya-taichou. Your face. I trust it is back to... regular-looking. Mostly.

Yoruichi-san.

Urahara-san.

Ichigo, your message has been forwarded. It is better to have this ugly face back than the other. This one is stronger.

Hanatarou, I haven't forgotten the fate of your fingers. Which two would you like me to slice off? Or are you still too busy hiding behind that Goose Woman?

Zaraki-taichou? Vice Captain? Ikkaku? I'm famished. We should have a large lunch this afternoon. Or dinner, if you prefer?

[ooc: srry! eye strain = break from intarwebz. >>; Hitsu, he haets ur fais. urahara gets a not!apology. Yoruichi, he's speechless about ur srs captain bsnss. Ichigo gets an "apology accepted" in yumi!talk. God help the restaurant that hosts 11th div. food tiemz.]

:041:

Wed, 13 Aug 2008 21:04:03 GMT

[Private// Unhackable]

Idiots, the lot of them! I now understand why Aizen ~~despises the Shinigami.~~ It is a shame when your enemy has more manners that your damned allies. To call me ugly or less attractive than I am, surely there must be some defect in their decrepit brains. I'd glady remedy that by removing their heads one at a time.

And humans, the useless, weak clumps of flesh and blood. Bothersome bastards!

I have learned that blondes are extremely stupid as well. That is the only thing I can thank yesterday's atrocity for.

To Hell with them, the Gotei, humans, and ugly people alike!
[/Private]

Ikkaku!

[ooc: called 'ugly' one too many times yesterday. >>]

[Accidental Voice Post] :040:

Tue, 12 Aug 2008 17:28:21 GMT

[gentle rattling of metal chain links.]

[a pause, then a smirk quite audible in his voice]

Oooh, Ani. I didn't know you were into this kind of thing.

I understand if you were so taken by my beauty that you had to resort to this.

I commend you on doing it without waking me. Did you slip me something? ♥

[ooc: Handcuffed to Anita 'Big Boobs' Browning. browning_baby.]

:039:

Thu, 31 Jul 2008 23:09:48 GMT

I'm fortunate to still be able to speak after yesterday. Such an annoyance. Such horrible language, too. Profanity is not beautiful.

Ukitake-taichou, are you well?

Urahara-san pointed out an event that I had nearly forgotten. Tanabata, the tragic love story. I believe I will wear something special for the occasion.

Ikkaku, would you like to accompany me to a few places for the next days of the celebration? Urahara-san's shop is on the list as I am certain the majority of us would at least pass by and give regards if nothing else.

Zaraki-taichou? Yachiru? Are you interested in socializing for the occasion? ~~There will be food.~~

It isn't a party without the 11th.

Does anyone else have plans for the week?

:038: [Voice post]

Wed, 30 Jul 2008 18:17:41 GMT

City.

♫♪ I can tell you wanna taste it, but I'm gone make you chase it
You got to be patient, I like my men patient
More patience, you take might get you in more places
You can't be abrasive, has to know to pace it

If I let you get up on it, you gotta make a promise
That you gone put it on me, like no ones put it on me
Don't bore me, just show me, all men talk but don't please
I can be a tease, but I really wanna please you ♪♫

Explain.

:037:

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 19:25:29 GMT

Good afternoon, City. I trust you should be collecting the remains of your dignity after that horrendous affair yesterday. In compliance with Great Ayame-san, I fully believe that a good number of you have no right to be naked! Such horrific sights should be restricted to the showers, bath tubs, or buckets you bathe in.

But I will say this~ I received a number of compliments while fully clothed and unaffected. It's only natural that I should. Beautiful things are still striking without baring all. The curse did allow me to meet two appealing people.
Hotohori-san - How noble and graceful.
Jin-san - How stern and dignified.
The pleasure was all mine.

I will even thank the ugly walking stick for the early morning warm-up. I didn't quite appreciate certain parts of you flailing about due to the curse, but I will commend you for bruising my arm. I feel quite energized~

[Shinigami Filter]
BiHe, let's get rid of that baby fat. Under my leadership, you will be shaped into a real man.

A new arrival in the City. Welcome to Hell, Hinamori-san~ ♥ You will adjust quickly despite the curses and constant annoyances here.

Kira-saaaaaaan~ ♥ I've got a proposition about a job. You'll love it. Mind you, I don't particularly enjoy the idea of being obligated to instruct brats, it might be bearable with someone of your organizational skills.

No traumatic experiences from yesterday, Ukitake-taichou? I certainly hope not.

[/Shinigami Filter]

With energy to expend, I believe I will take a few trips around the city. Going back to the zoo sounds interesting. That Cashawarly bird thing Yachiru saw... I want to see just how ugly and vicious it is up close.

Later tonight~? Drinking.

[ooc: Cashawarly = Cassowary.]

:036:

Tue, 22 Jul 2008 19:17:44 GMT

What a wonderful play, Tomo-hime. I enjoyed my role very much. By far, I enjoyed the latest curse, as well.

I told you everything would be fine, Kira-san. You should have seen Zaraki-taichou's apartment. ♥ Kuchiki-taichou conducted himself in such a tragically beautiful manner, too. Ah, the compliment will be remembered for a long time to come!

I have an impulse for organization. Not that it wasn't in me to begin with. Today I just feel compelled.

To Do List

- Find a job
- Remain in an undisclosed location for the next 8 hours
- Check up on the progress of that make-over
- Acquire food
- Commission a new outfit

Needs

- Shampoo
- Facial Mask
- A thing called a Loofah Sponge
- Tabi
- A new brush
- ~~Feathers~~
- Job
- Body Scrub? ♥

Ugly People
Avoid at all costs.

- Bootlicker
- This thing
- This thing
- All Arrancar
- ♥
- Severe Facial Deficiency
- Loud Mouth
- Clearly a hollow
- ~~You~~
- Ugly Walk
- Self-Absorbed
- Ugly Hair

Ahh, this list is longer than expected. I believe it will continue throughout the day.

Most Beautiful Shinigami

- Ayasegawa Yumichika
Validated by the Population of the Seireitei

[ooc: Was totally going to skip this curse day, but The Enabler encourgaed me. |D Don't take it personally, folks. This is Yumichika at his finest. Judgemental Narc get~ And yes, the Ugly list might grow. Orihime, he's just jearous!]

:035:

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 00:22:04 GMT

Saaa. My body aches. What exactly did I do? What happened in the course of one day?

...

Addressing more serious matters.

Dear business men and women of the city, you are in need of aid. You desire flawless and dedicated prospective employees, do you not? Look no further. I, Ayasegawa Yumichika, and my talented associate, Kira Izuru, will satisfy your needs. We are adept and enviously skilled at whatever task is handed to us. Of course our dashing looks are something to be had in your place of work as well. ♥

Inquiries? By all means, ask. We'd love to serve you.

A word, if you please?

No, honestly. My hips. What... occurred yesterday?

... Yoruichi, you didn't sneak attack me again, did you?

:034:

Sat, 12 Jul 2008 18:53:20 GMT

Foolish, novice women. Pampered princesses lying around like useless ceramic dolls. Talentless.

I will show you how to be a gem among jewels, a diamond among dirt.

The sought after prize hidden beneath the dunes.

Oh great Sultans of this vast and endless land, shall I dance for you until your eyes have had their fill?

[Private// Unhackable]

After all, no one knows the true desires of a man like another man. Men make the best women.

[/Private]

[ooc: Attention whore. He's an entertainer! Female impersonator to be exact. (What? Didn't know there was such a thing as a male belly dancer?) He'll be performing, collecting admirers in hopes of attracting the attention of a Sultan so he can live the good life and be spoiled. In ur harem, out-dancing/out-prettying ur wiminz. Appearance is as presented in his icons.]

:033:

Mon, 07 Jul 2008 22:24:53 GMT

[Filtered from Traitors and Arrancar // Shinigami Filter // Viewable to the Substitute]

What about scared crows? I didn't notice anything. How weak, to raise a commotion about frightened birds. Humans' fears are irrational.

Ukitake-taichou and Kyouraku-taichou are back in the city. It is both a relief and a bitter thing. To be home one moment, then torn away again, saaaa...

Of course this means a few things. I am in search of employment again. Which brings me to my next point:

Oh, Hisagi~san~? ♥

Today is supposed to be an important one for a key player in the Soul Society, isn't it? I am surprised I remembered such a trivial thing. A test must be conducted to see how well a certain strawberry has ripened; how sweet he has become.

My order can be turned into fun after all. I'm thinking of throwing him... a "party~."

:032:

Fri, 04 Jul 2008 03:40:30 GMT

[Private]

July 3rd

Dearest Ikkaku,

Good afternoon! I firmly believe it is well into noon by now because you rarely wake at morning. So lazy!

Do you miss me? ♥ You've well noticed how long I've been missing, haven't you? It wasn't my intention to to leave without notice. I was forcibly and suddenly taken and delivered to a place that the residents simply call "The City." I've been here for 62 days to date and much has happened.

Those absences you may have noticed in the Seireitei could more than likely be credited to this phenomenon. So many are here already. Even our enemies walk beside us. Aizen, Tousen, Ichimaru, Espada. There seems to be some non-aggression pact established- ridiculous, I know- between us and them. I don't understand it. There is noticeable tension about, especially among the Shinigami and Ichigo. Just recently you may have witnessed the return of Ukitake-taichou and Kyouraku-taichou. The City seems to draw in and spit out whomever as it pleases.

Taichou and fukutaichou are here... and even though it may be more sensible for you to be home, I'd like it if you were here, too. Sometimes it gets lonely without the other most important part of the 11th Division here with me, but I get by. If one stays locked away and solitary for too long here, the ticking from an underground clock will drive one mad. I was fortunate enough to be picked up on my arrival in the City and ~~invited~~ tolerated by the 4th Division, but I've been saving (yes, I work) to vacate to my own apartment and relieve them of my inconvenience. I tried to hold off long enough just in case you should be drawn to The City; you'd have a place to reside. So far, it has not been so. I'd ask to reside with Hisagi-san or vice versa for my own reasons, but his sentiments toward me may not be the best. Haha~ He, Kira-san, Matsumoto-san, and Renji-kun are living together, I believe. It would be too crowded with my added presence. Zaraki and Yachiru are a disaster to live with. The house-keeping... I will continue to wait for you despite the ticking. Just in case you end up here.

Ah, and lest I forget, the curses. Deities run this city and cast curses upon us. By chance, some are affected and some are not.The most recent was a curse in which residents were turned into children. Some suffered physically, some mentally, or both. I was a victim of the former, my adult brain being completely in tact. How would you have enjoyed that, Ikkaku, to go back to those days? Our days of struggle and fighting both inner and outer demons. Mn...

Yachiru was crawling, as we first found her so long ago. Could you believe that I fooled Captain into granting me a ride atop his shoulder? It was quite a distance from the ground. Kira-san would make just as nervous a father as he is a person, but good nonetheless. He was disturbed by my insisting that I jump from a second-story window just so he could catch me. Hanatarou-san fared well and prepared dinner for us. Ichigo was unaffected and yelled at all the children in the city. Hisagi-san was even crying as a child. Nemu, who I have come to get along with fairly well, was unaffected. Did you know that Nanao-san wore glasses when she was younger? She was terribly cute.

Ah, but the most surprising transformation was that of the stoic and prideful Kuchiki-taichou. Ikkaku, he was so scrawny! And such a brat, too. He still maintained that infamous pride, but it was coupled with a temper. Difficult to picture, isn't it? He looked nothing like the material of a Noble. More likely as a member of the 11th. Haha~

Well, I must conclude this unsent letter. The last rays of light are giving way to dusk and the shifting bamboo near Ukitake-taichou's former residence is signaling its want for solitude. Take care of things back home, will you? I know you are more than capable.

With Envious Magnificence,
- Yumichika

[/Private]

Kira-san, you've found employment prospects?